The Freak of Freakland

There is a day. That's today. I traveled on a train. There was a train. I've been waiting for a Cancer to come to the station. There is a Cancer at the station. I had waited for a conversation with the Cancer. There was a conversation witht the Cancer. I had waited to travel with the Cancer. There was a common commute to Freakland. I had longed to travel with the Cancer by the window of the train to Freakland. There was me travelling by the window. The Cancer wasn't there.
We got to Freakland. We stapped foot separately. Every freak of Freakland stared at me. There was a communal staring. I had to wait and speak to the Cancer. There wasn't such thing. There were headphones and I put them. I should have waited for the Cancer. I didn't waited for the Cancer. The Cancer walked behind my back. There wasn't face by my side. There was mistake in all of it. I should've stopped and waited for the Cancer.
Should?
Orpheus lost the modern Eurydice.
The Freak of Freakland wasn't a freak. The Freak become a freak on Freakland.



End.

The Cycling Cycle

We all cycle in a way. Yep. We do. When we are little we are eager to get our first bicycle thrills. We are taught how to do it. And we do it. It's not easy at first, then  we got used to it and the difficulty becomes a lifestyle.
Next stage : you are a teenager and would like to feel like teenage films characters - cycling through the city, freely and carelessly of anything in this world ( but too deep as a person in a film, of course). And you do - you continue cycling but now you try new routes. You try pathways running through the forest, outside the city streets and so on. You want to be amid the life but not exactly into it, you want some time for yourself only. And you experiment with a bike and yourself. That's the transition period of falling down, losing equilibrium and getting on our feet again and again. The beautiful scenery meanwhile can be considered an advantage, too.
Post-teenage phase: what happens? You are tired of cycling on your own. You are bored by your nature and want to share the sight of a hill over there with someone that loves bicycles too. And you perhaps can have a chance to find such a person. You start cycling together. You may change it. Or several times. Or not. Mhm. Then you need to buy new bicycles.
The tutor period: you have children. Congrats! You teach them. They get their first bicycle experience. It's strange to see yourself again but somehow modified. Yep. And they took off to outside the city routes where they fall and find new people.
It's damn strange cycle, huh?!

The Zodiac Prejudice: The Railways ( Part 3 )

I'm cold as a match 

Ready to strike...

- FF

Well, Maggie got to the station. Otherwise the story would've lost its sense. Sam was sitting on a bench, staring through his glasses. Maggie stopped for a second. She was curious to know. She wanted to see what he could see. What could he see through his eyes? How did he feel about it? What was amazing, astonishing, disappointing, sad, lithle, childish, remarkable, beautiful, intriguing? What did he see?

She went on, stumbled and stepped by his side. Taken aback,he looked at her for a second, then gazing in the nowhere ( again ) said:

"Have you noticed that railway lines wave in for certain length, then split and continue in two parallel lines?"

She looked at the far division.

"Yes, you are right," she blinked, "I haven't noticed."

"Sit " he smiled at her.

Further on, they talked about little things, big things, films and songs, bands and theoretical physics, literature and trivia awkwerdness. She calmed down. He was calm.

Then Maggie asked:

"Do you know that everything has a beginning but has an end too?"

They kept silence.

"You are not right. You need to change the sentence. You need to twist it for such an unfortunate truth deserves the solace of ostentatious beauty."

"And how should it sound?" Maggie asked.

"Rather... The beginning of an end is far less the value of the mean. What do you think?"

"Too complex. Complexity sucks."

"Ok, radical."

He gazed at the nothing again.

"What would you say about ... Between the beginning and the end is all we call impractical. Impractical is what matters."

Maggie feverishly looked for a hidden message that meant he did not like her. She failed to find it.

"Yes, I like it more that way."

Sam smiled and gazed at her face. This time his glasses were all in her direction. She could read them. At least, she decided to believe what she saw. She decided for once not to let strong sense overtake the beauty of probable illusion. She wanted to believe and so did she. Just let go and answered his gaze with a look full of simple complexity, beautiful anxiety and passive desire. 

Still looking at her eyes, Sam mumbled mumbled:

"So you share my lck of pragmatism?..."

She sighed a yes.

They kissed and continued tracing the railway lines and routes together.

What happened afterwards? I can't really give an answer to this question. It is not my story to follow it. Then Maggied and Sam followed the railways but today may be the beginning of an end... Or it could have been yesterday. That is how trivial life becomes unique to some - they need just to let go and quit planning. Others, though, need planning the next second or they quit life. The trivial ending is the perfect beginning of a story - it evokes the collision of simple and complex.

What more?!

The Zodiac Prejudice: The Yoghurt of My Thoughts ( Part 2 )

The trivial ending of an episode is not necessarily a flaw. It actually tests one's prejudices to literature, one's actual interest. Well, same cannot be stated for life. Life is too trivial and basic in its pop form that a trivial ending of an episode could be deadly.
Right from there, the smelly gym, Maggie went in Maths class. It was time of thoughts for her lacked of logical principles nature. As long as test was not on schedule, she could afford the splendour of 'utilizing' time not the best way. Or was it the best? So stepping still nervously in the classroom she met the curious eyes of little nasty people deprived of the virtue not to intrude.
She sat on a chair and opened the book randomly. The time to think  had come.
Pulling the sleeve of her shirt, anxious of what she was to do. To judge. To judge upon the many possible prejudices one can think of. Wrong word. Too short to be tall enough. Too unromantic. Too romantic. Not smart. Smart enough. Pisces? 1995? Why? Too old. 1998. Too young?
Maggie realised she was on her way to evaluate people and, unfortunately, that was her ultimate hate. Plus sexism in Game of Thrones. She started looking through options. Were there any choices she could skip making? Just like in computer games - you skip the reference part and then fight for your life as hard as possible. Hardly had she begun her brain-racking campaign when the teacher walked in. Everyone stood up.
"Good morning."
"Good morning." came as a declaration of indifference.
They sat once again. Maggie started  digging through the plot of every book she had chucked away under her bed. Alas, she couldn't recall a title of zodiac, sociology and love.
Love ?
Since when has I become love?!
Misunderstanding. Mixture of impressions. Confusion of definitions. That was it. She had to read Pride and Prejudice once again. There must have been something that could find its significance these days.
The conclusions of the by-gone day were as follows:
1) You need some rest!
2) Don't hesitate to stop resting. Think, damn!
3) Buy yoghurt.
4) Call Sam... Yes, do it!
It was her who got home by train.b she couldn't see him there. He was not on a daily shift now. All she wanted in order to come back in peace was simply see him.
It was not love. Love embodies the unknown depth in a single definition.
"Aerosmith will definitely help!"
3 songs later: Fuck! Nothing helped.
Maggie decided to remain anxious as she felt differently. And different needed to be observed. Interstellar put this question: if you notice something new, observe it, describe it, declare its natural laws. So Maggie did the same - kept the phenomenon for as long as she could.
On her pillow, at 23:43, she was still into thoughts about judging, Sam, Pride and Prejudice , Sam, zodiac, Sam. Obviously, it was his turn to disturb her unknowingly. She hoped, secretly and with certain worry that her figure disturbed him too. Unknowingly. She felt asleep.
The next morning Maggie woke up. Above, there in the semi-night sky, the moon was hanging. It was pouring with silver upon everything. She got up. Sam wasn't on the train. It was Friday. She wanted to see him. Just to talk. Talk about anything...
That day Maggie avoided any looks and talks of little importance. It turned out to be avoiding everything. Full of tension, though denying it to herself, she waited for her phone to ring. Maggie truly wanted to see him; just an hour with him... She could well pass beyond any prejudice. Hardly had her phone rung till the last class. Eventually, it did. A message:
Hey! The station. 3 o'clock?
- S.
A wave of sweet relief passed through her.
I'll be there.
- M.
Maggie, dreaming of the forthcoming, did care little about conscious reality. Walking down the boulevard, she listened to James Bay's Hold Back the River . The bustling now of the somehow affecting her. From where she started, a mess, a ball of confusion, a kiss bringing too many questions, now she felt relief of simplified image. Planning could not find ots place in her image. Having realised for a moment how superfluously overrated planning was, she decided to let herself on the flow. How trivial could an ending be?! You haven't seen yet.

The Zodiac Prejudice : The Pisces Issue ( Part 1 )

"And he is Pisces?! What? Are you nuts?!"
It was the voice of school girl that irritates the innocent walls of the gym. A blonde in her ethno dress was too worries about a friend's astrological match. Obviously, she didn't bother to involve as much audience as possible.
"Shut up! Come on, I don't want everyone to know, " said the object of probable Pisces madness, " Let's go to the cafeteria."
Walking out of the gym, the smell of communal sweat left behind and fresh air came in. God bless the process of glucose synthesis!
As passing through the sad yard, they met people. People of any kind, of any zodiacal sign or of any appearance. As reality reflects everything, it is a hard task for one to notice the main in the reflection; among the graceful shine of Sun in her hair or the deep look of his ocean eyes, the fireplace of their eyes or the musical smile of friends' it is a complicated task to outline the main prejudice you would like to dedicate yourself to. Please, don't deny your dedication to a prejudice. The truth is everyone has a prejudice to judge others according to. But this is just a story. Right?
By a window, down the hall, the blonde and the mad were quietly discussing the globally insignificant question of a crush. They deformed it over and over again, putting it in and out of different aspects. Although a teenage discussion isn't something to impress the old generations, the newly risen topic of zodiacal compatibility. Hundreds of  years old statistics successfully receives a trivial character nowadays. How ironically practical. So how would it be possible for a Pisces to fall for Sagittarius? Was it serious? Interpretation is all one can count on as there is nothing more to be counted on in these cases.
"So you are saying he is kind of cute?"
"Mmh, yes. I don't like the word cute. He is ... Impressive."
"I still can't understand how you get to like a  Pisces?"
"Hey!!!"
"What?"
"Stop classifying people... By your damn zodiacal bullshit."
"Why? It is true. It is statistics. Long-termed. It is still going on. And I am sticking to it."
"Man, come on! You are not right! Pisces or Cancer or Moncer - it is meaningless."
"There is no Moncer in the zodiac " the blonde cut out.
"Why?! You say so! A fucking guru says so! It is a damn scale, " she jumped from her chair, " for evaluating people before even asking them if they liked cheese!!!"
The dark-haired ( sp far known as "she" ), Maggie, walked out of the cafeteria angrily enough to grab some attention. As usual, confused eyes fell at her friend.
Why would anyone be judged before even knowing them? It is a degradation of humanity. That's how Maggie considered all kinds of factors that affected one's opinion beforehand.
"It's a total shit!" she whispered while walking across the yard. She was not a stupid girl, therefore she knew people can't be perfectly good. They have preconceived opinions built on judgements. Prejudices vary - beauty or not, smart or not, rich or not, the right zodiacal sign or not, easy or not... There's no moderate level - either you are or you are not. You want to make friends with an all-about-metal peer? Are you all-about-metal or not? You like one's voice. Are you in love or not?!
It is a world of prejudice, yes. I want to kiss you but you have the preconceived idea that kissing is only a form of showing your deepest love. I want to cut my hands. You pre-judged me - you think I am a psycho. You listen to The Smiths, I to Muse. We are freaks, together in the prejudice, right?
Maggie pulled the locker of hostile green metal and took a bar of chocolate. Sat and ate it. The smell of sweat was excluded now. She vividly remembered last night - how she had walked down the lane with him, had gone to the regatta zone, had sat on a bench. They had talked little of everything they could share. Confusion. Tension in a peaceful manner. A release of laughter. Then they had kissed. Like hell. Who of them gave a shit about zodiacal signs under each others trembling fingers?! Little did they care. Actually, how can one have prejudice?
If being objective, one can't judge something without experiencing it because they don't know its true value and reason. The connotation of good and bad nowadays is too flexible. A prejudice can be a past event, not a judgement.
And so on . They had kissed. They had got home. It was a past event. Could Maggie have prejudice now?
What for?!
Did she have such?
The bar of chocolate had gone.